Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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