Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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