One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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