I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize