I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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