ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
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You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
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Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.