I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.