What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
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Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
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Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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