It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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