Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
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