it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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