The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize