I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?