Plan B is the new Plan A
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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