whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
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