I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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