You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
