i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Randomize
