Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
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I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
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All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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