Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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