I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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