Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize