You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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