Nicole vs. Life
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong