Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits