maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
it was like his penis was on wheels.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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