he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
be there in ten.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE