im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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