He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
