3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
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