I bet he comes in French.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
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I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You ruined the universe
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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