hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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