does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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