yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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