Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
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woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
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Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.