He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
