Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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