Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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