girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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