Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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