Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously