you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
