Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
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You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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