You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
