The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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