Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
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his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
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I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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