Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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