how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.