Texts From Last Night

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  (443): View more from Maryland

  My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT

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  (443): My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT http://tfl.nu/f0p2
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.

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  (419): It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo. http://tfl.nu/e5lr
  Replies (4) Good night (511) Bad night (3658) Order T-Shirt
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  (578): View more from

  drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm

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  (578): drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm http://tfl.nu/89pn
  Replies (14) Good night (882) Bad night (6081) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock

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  (609): Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock http://tfl.nu/dnop
  Replies (6) Good night (4721) Bad night (1109)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?

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  (704): Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls? http://tfl.nu/h3go
  Replies (11) Good night (4024) Bad night (992) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.

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  (925): At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night. http://tfl.nu/1jxg
  Replies (9) Good night (4063) Bad night (1242) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night

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  (610): There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night http://tfl.nu/8wbo
  Replies (8) Good night (3760) Bad night (789) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.

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  (678): Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job. http://tfl.nu/5ogs
  Replies (11) Good night (3947) Bad night (697) Order T-Shirt
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold

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  (843): Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold http://tfl.nu/201i
  Replies (2) Good night (531) Bad night (1448) Order T-Shirt
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.

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  (+61): remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice. http://tfl.nu/vzpo
  Replies (21) Good night (4256) Bad night (510) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.

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  (202): There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again. http://tfl.nu/5erg
  Replies (18) Good night (2523) Bad night (489) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.

  (1-401): View more from Rhode Island

  Oh that's normal

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  (401): No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus. (1-401): Oh that's normal http://tfl.nu/3sqc
  Replies (6) Good night (1879) Bad night (399) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.

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  (479): I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober. http://tfl.nu/132v
  Replies (4) Good night (1412) Bad night (552)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?

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  (920): Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night? http://tfl.nu/ykmq
  Replies (4) Good night (539) Bad night (602) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice

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  (949): I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice http://tfl.nu/cwbs
  Replies (11) Good night (1296) Bad night (487) Order T-Shirt

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