I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine