How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
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